WONDERBOY

i've had a penchant for super heroes since childhood.

i imagined myself flying through the sky or breaking through brick walls with my fists. using only my mind to read other's thoughts or psychically lifting things and sending them spinning across the room.

i prayed that my DNA would be altered.

now, a full grown adult, i'm beginning to question whether i'll ever be transformed into a crime fighting superhero. it's getting harder and harder to be "accidentally" exposed to a focused beam of gamma radiation, to be fortunate enough to be hanging around during a dramatic miscalculation in a chemical laboratory or being abducted by the government for top secret military experimentation.

since the likelihood of a lucky accident isn't looking good, i may have to take the first steps myself. i've thought about hanging around outside the x-ray room at the hospital on my free time. maybe i could sneak in and find a good place to hide out. absorbing all that sweet radiation that's wasted in the atmosphere. or possibly i could track down a prime illegal nuclear waste dump site. if i had the funds, i'd be bionically altering myself as we speak. it can't be that hard to jam a few microchips and a WiFi modem into my brain.